The Horrors of Holiday Club Gitmo – What Guantanamo Bay is Really Like

UPDATES February 2009: Investigation ordered by Obama concludes that Gitmo meets Geneva Conventions standards! Eat that, jihadi-loving hippies!

UPDATE 16 June 2009: Freed Gitmo detainees get to live in Bermuda paradise as ‘punishment’!

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UPDATE November 2008: President Elect Obama plans to close down Guantanamo Bay.

I say, good riddance! Free air-conditioning, Korans, prayer rugs, rich food, piped-in music and exercise equipment for terrorists – at taxpayer expense – is an unneccesary exorbitance in the current economic climate.

Here’s hoping the detainees will be transferred to accomodations far more fitting and ‘humane’ than Gitmo – like a Chinese prison or North Korean ‘reeducation’ camp.

But: Some of Obama’s advisors are cautioning Obama against his foolhardy plan!! Meanwhile, they’ll be getting movie nights, art classes, English language lessons, and “Game Boy-like” electronic devices…

What? Game Boy-like? No Sony PSP-like or Nintendo DS-like?

Oh wait, never mind… They get free laptop computers:

In this photo of a sketch by courtroom artist Janet Hamlin, reviewed by the U.S. Military, the five Sept. 11, 2001 attack co-defendants sit during a hearing at the U.S. Military Commissions court for war crimes, at the U.S. Naval Base, in Guantanamo Bay, January 19, 2009. From top to bottom, they are Khalid Sheikh Momhammed, Waleed Bin Attash, Ramzi Binalshibh, Ali Abdul Aziz Ali, and Mustafa Ahmad al Hawsawi.

And taxi driver training:

In a sketch by courtroom artist Olivia Chow, Canada’s child Omar Khadr studies the Ontario drivers manual in preparation for achieving his goal of being a taxi-driver in Toronto.

Torture!!!

Ann Coulter recounts the case of a one-legged Gitmo detainee being horrifically given a new artifical leg. At the cost of $75,000 taxpayer money… Then going back to the battlefield and kidnapping civilians as soon as he was released. And also how the lie-beral MSM misportrays just where he got his plastic prosthetic.

Also: When the European Union uses worse torture than America, it is considered not torture because, well, the EU and not America. WTF???!!!

Horrifically skewed is how I’d describe the mental state of Obama and his Gitmo-Is-Torture zombies.

Meanwhile, 50% of Americans want to keep Gitmo open – versus 44% who want it closed.

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Oh, Guantanamo Bay is soooooooo bad and inhumane! The poor innocent widdle babies who just happened to be wandering around a terrorist battlefield have to put up with horrific tortures such as:

• Air conditioning that is a bit too cold

• Christina Aguilera music that is not to their taste

• Great music like Metallica, AC/DC, RHCP and… Barney the Dinosaur. It really IS torture at Gitmo!

• Balls that are not bouncy enough, soap that is not fragrant enough

• Muslim call to prayer over loudspeaker 5 times a day, free prayer rugs, meals shifted for Ramadhan fasting

• 1600 Korans provided free of charge using taxpayer money (which are not flushed into toilets)

• Lots of food of many varieties, to the point they get all chubby

• At least 80 lawyers defending them for free (oh, wait… They’re actually sponsored by Middle East nations.)

• Beautiful female interrogaters who make them uncomfortably excited

• Treatment so much in violation of human rights that Gitmo detainee begs to stay

• Torture so excruciating that Gitmo detainees fear leaving Guantanamo to return to own countries

• Endless opportunities to abuse and attack their cowering, law-restrained guards

Don’t forget your souvenirs!

Please note the vacationers are alleged terrorists who want to kill us all just because we don’t adopt their religion. As soon as some were released, they went straight to Afghanistan to kill locals and kidnap charity workers again. We don’t even treat Nobel Prize winners this well on taxpayer money.

And btw… You want real torture?

Here’s some for you:

And here’s some videos of what real human rights abuses look like.

HINT: Those aren’t Americans doing the torturing. Waterboarding (so gentle that any bloke off the street can experience it) is for amateurs who actually believe in human rights.

From Cox and Forkum – Gitmo Absurd:

Tags: Gitmo, gitmo detainees well treated, gitmo torture, Guantanamo Bay, Holiday Camp Gitmo, holiday club gitmo