Whether Obama Wins or Loses, I Still Benefit

So, come November 4… Will Obama win and be the most liberal, radical, socialist, condescending, inexperienced, inept, uninformed, dishonest, race grievancing, and demagogic President in American history? (And yes, he’ll be the first Black President too… How that is a qualification for leadership escapes me.)

The polls seem to have it that Obama is in for a near landslide victory… But then, polls have been historically proven to be biased towards the Democrats. So all bets are off.

But either way the 2008 American Presidential Election goes, I don’t entirely lose out.

See, if Obama loses… Well, that’ll be a huge sigh of relief to have narrowly avoided his FAIL policies, which even halfway across the world would have had a far-reaching, detrimental effects to last for years to come.

And if Obama wins… That’s 4 more years of funtastic, mockerific blogging for me! Seriously, I never had this much fun being snarky, even with the Al Goracle and his global warming farce!

President Obama, say hello to what Bush had to endure for his two terms! (Only far less crass and violent… We are Conservatives, after all.)

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10 Responses to “Whether Obama Wins or Loses, I Still Benefit”

  1. hutchrun Says:

    I`m really looking forward to Bambi in the White House. It`s gonna be great fun like you say scott.
    To start with maybe we`ll get Nancy Pelosi walking around in a burqa. Or finally that clottish woman Oprah will get beaten up with Michelle for showing too much ankle. Yummmmy.
    Or maybe before that we`ll get to see some real wealth distribution and business shutdowns. So much more to come.

  2. hutchrun Says:

    Nice Map to look forward to:

  3. oneworldmaybenot Says:

    Too bad its not Hillary becos that would be funnier.

  4. kesava Says:

    Say on the bright side once the muslims take care of the apostate, there`s always Biden to be potus. That will be a gem.

  5. kesava Says:

    That could easily come true as replay of Kennedy-Johnson dem (damn) administrations in 50s & 60s.
    Long Live Joe Biden!! He is the only one who is “Bidden”.

  6. baaaaad Says:

    The Onion is a satiric newspaper, not meant to be taken seriously. Still, good satire has to have at least an element of truth or it’s just not funny. The Onion apparently is so blinded by its antipathy for Barack Obama that it can’t recognize this just is not humorous at all:

    In a campaign gaffe that could potentially jeopardize Sen. Barack Obama’s White House bid, the Democratic presidential nominee told nearly 8,000 supporters Tuesday that, if elected, he would be a terrible president. . . .

    “My youth and inexperience would definitely make me an awful president,” said Obama, whose seven-minute misstep was further exacerbated when he called himself “no expert” on the economy. “To be perfectly honest, I’d be worried about putting me in charge of the most powerful military in the world because I’m not any good when it comes to making important decisions. Also, I’m not sure how much I care about keeping this great nation of ours safe.”
    C’mon, Obama would never say anything like that. It’s the kind of thing Joe Biden would say.

  7. distaf Says:

    Obama outlines plan for national service.

    “We cannot continue to rely only on our military in order to achieve the national security objectives that we’ve set,” he said Wednesday. “We’ve got to have a civilian national security force that’s just as powerful, just as strong, just as well funded.” – Obama

    The Department of Defense’s current base budget is close to $500 billion. So if he meant that promise, he plans on a total defense budget of about a trillion dollars.

    What exactly is Obama planning to do with a “civilian force” with such an astronomical level of funding?

  8. Stephen Says:

    You’re absolutely right! Nice blog BTW, I’ve bookmarked it. If Obama does win, I will come here often for consolation 😀

  9. wits0 Says:



    Could you help me please find these things, sir?

    1. Occidental College records — Not released
    2. Columbia College records — Not released
    3. Columbia Thesis paper — “not available”
    4. Harvard College records — Not released
    5. Selective Service Registration — Not released
    6. Medical records — Not released
    7. Illinois State Senate schedule — “not available”
    8. Law practice client list — Not released
    9. Certified Copy of original Birth certificate — Not released
    10. Embossed, signed paper Certification of Live Birth — Not released
    11. Harvard Law Review articles published — None
    12. University of Chicago scholarly articles — None
    13. Your Record of baptism– Not released or “not available”
    14. Your Illinois State Senate records–“not available”

    You lying socialist Black Racist..Vote PALIN/MCCAIN 2008

    Posted by: ebal | Monday, November 03, 2008 at 09:47 PM

  10. u people are retarded Says:


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