Archive for the ‘Fun Fun Doodle Dum!’ Category

Am I A Jew?

May 29, 20


President Donald Trump Facts

February 24, 17

In the same vein as Chuck Norris Facts, 1 Malaysia Facts, Rick Perry Facts, Barack Obama facts and the hilariousest Dick Cheney Facts

From AoSHQ here are my picks of the best Donald Trump Facts:

His apartment in Manhattan is decorated in solid platinum but he had it coated in gold to appear humble.

On November 9th he sent a cheap plastic button to Russia that said, ‘Thanks Bitch.’ In English.

He doesn’t give a rat’s *ss which bathroom Lindsey Graham uses.

He whispered to Meghan McCain that he was going to grab her by the pussy, then shook her father’s hand.

He organized a photo shoot with a bald eagle just so it could know what it was like to be so close to a symbol of pure freedom.

When emotional, Donald Trump has been known to shed tears in the shape of tiny diamond encrusted bald eagles.

Trump did hire Russian prostitutes. Strictly to practice dealing with Democrats.

Trump was going to combine the USFL with the Miss Universe Pageant and call it America, F*ck Yeah.

Trumps pussy grabbing once got so outta hand a tiger in Tasmania went extinct.
Also the reason you no longer see a real lion on the MGM logo.

Old NYC joke about Trump:
Donald is in the lobby of Trump Tower, getting into the elevator, when a hot Hungarian blond jumps in with him.
Door closes and they’re alone. The blond says: I’m going to give you the greatest blow job ever.
Trump thinks for a beat and replies: OK, what’s in it for me?

Trump put in an offer to change the Hollywood sign to TRUMP. Would only charge the city half of his going price.

Superman wears Donald Trump underwear.

General Mattis’s rug peed itself when PTD visited.

Trump always bowls a perfect 300 score. One look from him and the pins all fall down.

Donald Trump once told an Aristocrats joke that made Bob Saget cry.

George Patton (believer in reincarnation) dies in 1945. Donald Trump is born in 1946.
Coincidence? I think not!

Donald Trump plays Monopoly with real properties.

The consistency of Trump’s hair is a state secret.

Three-letter-network journalists have all requested asbestos long underwear.

President Trump’s animatronic figure at Disney World’s Hall of Presidents will fire laser beams from its eyes at any audience member that boos when Trump’s name is announced.

Every President’s Day, it will rip the sax out of animatronic Clinton’s hands & shove it up obama’s animatronic coal chute.

In the presence of Trump, all snowflakes become the same.

Trump built the Wall in Westeros and got the Wildings to pay for it.

Trump is actually two of the Four Horsemen.

Trump called Angela Merkel low energy, and Germany suffered a brownout.

Trump parted his hands and the Red Sea said “How high, Sir?”

Ballistic missiles will return to their silos at Trump’s command.

Trump has no desire to be carved onto Mt Rushmore but would agree to rebrand it as Mt Trump.

Donald Trump once mentiioned to his golfing buddies that he could make his d*ck 12 inches long.
When his buddies asked him how he could reach the 12 inch length, DJT answered, immodestly, ‘I just fold it in half’…..

Danger took Donald Trump’s middle name.

Donald Trump will bring the NFL to heel by insisting that all 32 teams immediately adopt the name “Redskins”.

John Galt wonders “who is Donald Trump?”.

Trump was born to a drunk absentee father and a mother so virulently communist that she left his Indonesian stepfather when he was promoted to a stable and profitable job. Then his mother died, and he lived with his grandparents and was tutored by a communist buddy while doing f*ck-all in school, skated through college, and got shuffled up from do-nothing cake job in Chicago to the US Senate and then the presidency.
Wait, I may be thinking of someone else.

Trump can eat only one Lay’s potato chip.

When Donald Trump declares “the guys get shirts”, a million sheep disappear.

Trumps drill works even better in reverse.

To summon extra strength while arm-wrestling, Donald Trump has been know to turn his toupee backwards.

Donald Trump has a one man Supertramp tribute band called Supertrump. After a stirring rendition of “The Logical Song” over the phone, Gorbachev started glasnost.

The White House Press Corps wear Depends to his pressers to hide the embarrassment of their bodily response when he speaks to them.

Trump believes it’s not butter.

The colossus of Rhodes. Yep, it’s Trump.

Trump squeezed the Charmin (twice)

Donald Trump has had sharks with laser beams mounted in their heads since he was twelve years old.

In the remake of Revenant, Trumps screws the bear

Trump gets royalty payments every time the phrases alt-right and alt-left are used in social media.

Trump made the unions build him a wall around Mara Lago, and they paid him for the experience.

After watching Trump’s press conference, Wade Wilson took the MSM in his Deadpool

Donald Trump visited the Virgin Islands a couple of years ago.
Now they’re just known as “The Islands”.
Richard Branson won’t let him fly on Virgin Airlines.

Trump was the inspiration for the Death Star, even though his exhaust port is bigger than two meters.

And the one that blows Democrats away:
President Trump can speak without using the word “Umm”.

Trump pulled on Superman’s cape, and Trump messed around with Jim.

When Trump crosses path with a bear, the bear plays dead.

Donald Trump thinks Red Dawn is the best documentary ever.

MSM hasn’t figured it out yet, but Trump has grabbed them by the pussy, and he’s not letting go.

Trump poked the bear, and the bear said “Sorry.”

When Trump moves the Overton Window, he gets a 40% discount

Donald Trump is about to force the Mexican government to buy the Great Wall of China, then disassemble it using deported illegal aliens from this country, transport it to our border with Mexico and rebuild it there.

Donald Trump sees nothing but dead people in the WH Press Room.

Donald Trump is Darth Vader’s father

Trump watched “Old Yeller” and didn’t cry.

Trump thinks Galactus is a pussy.

At the start of each news conference Trump demands the press chant, “Those of us who are about to die salute you.”

Donald Trump’s first order as Commander in Chief was the torpedoing of Olbermann’s duck.

Well, nanotechnology is getting pretty amazing these days.

I first read that as “Olbermann’s d*ck” and wondered if we have technology that precise

PDT’s name is a killing word.

If Trump had built it, Pink wouldn’t have been able to tear down the Wall

If you review the original documents, FDR said:
“We have nothing to fear but fear itself”
“And that f*cking Trump guy”

When Trump drops his jellied toast, it lands jelly side up

After January 20, the White House became
Donald J. Trump
The White House

When Ah-ha sang “take on me” Trump already had

Trump and Cheney had a bet to see who could hurl a large rock further into space.
Some scientists call the result of this bet THE F*CKING MOON.

Trump’s hair is a known cure for lycanthropy.

PDT and Dick Cheney shook hands and the space time continuum was never the same again

Donald Trump is going to bankrupt that putz Zuckerberg by launching InYourFacebook.

PDT had a cameo on Red Dawn. Patrick Swayze didn’t come out of his trailer for three days.

The Black-Eyed Peas will gain relevance again with their new single, “My Trump.”

Trump was going to fight the Law, but the Law forfeited and Trump won by default.

Voldemort is afraid to speak Trump’s name

Trump got the Ad Council to run commercials about shutting down the Ad Council.

When Trump is on board – you don’t need a bigger boat

Explanation for Bermuda Triangle: Trump needs boats

Soylent Green is made of Trump’s enemies, and he approves.

When an establishment hangs a sign that reads “Trump Slept Here,” birth rates increase 20%.

Trump has signed an executive order repealing SMOD.

Trump cheated death.
Death was actually ok with it.

Trump suspended entropy.

It was Trump who decreed that the words DON’T PANIC appear on the cover of “Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.”

On meeting PDT, John Wick said, “F*ck it, I’m out”

The most interesting Man in the World, says Trump is more interesting…

The inuit have 50 words for snow, and 100 words for Trump.

Donald Trump carves custom shelving from Redwood trees utilizing his little hands and an Russian oyster knife.

In two billion years, our sun will burn out. Then Trump will work in the dark

Donald Trump has had all of Obama’s skittle-shi*tting unicorns hunted down, killed, dressed out, butchered and frozen. They’ll be served at all WH State Dinners.

President Trump’s new limo?
Optimus Prime in disguise.

Millions died fighting in wars over the doctrine of Trumpocentrism – does Trump orbit the sun, or does the sun orbit Trump? To this day science is only on the fringes of this fascinating question.

Exactly who do you think the Blondie song “call me” was about. Friggin desperate plea

Sequoia seeds dream of growing up to be Trump’s schlong

Trump called Kim Jong-Un and *sshole and his brother died.

Once lightning struck Donald Trump, lightning knew it was his bitch.

And he chugs the Water of Life because he likes the taste.

He bought the manufacturing and labeling rights. Now it’s the Water of Trump

Donald Trump painted the Mona Lisa – he describes doing so in Art of the Deal.

On the painting’s mistaken attribution, he writes “Lyin Leo couldn’t even paint by numbers. Had to write his diary using a mirror because he had no friends. Sad!”

When Trump’s yacht requests that a light house yield right-of-way, it does.

Trump defeated an entire division of North Koreans armed with a rock and a scowl. He never used the rock.

Babe the Blue Ox left Paul Bunyan for Trump.

Donald Trump heard about the earthquake that just wiped out 1 million in Mexico City!
He’s sending 5 million replacements.

Trump refused the Godfather’s offer. Then slapped him with his d*ck.

Putin’s mistresses lie back and pretend it’s Trump.

That Global Warming thing we used to have? Yeah, it was disturbing Donald’s orchids.

Trump made the Kessel Run in 6 parsecs!

George Washington stuck his hand from the grave just to give Trump a thumbs-up

Chtulhu fondly refers to his friend Donald J. Trump as “That old bastard that doesn’t like to give reach-arounds”

Trump beat up Clark Kent for his lunch money every damn day.

Donald Trump is goingvto buy up all copies of Stars Wars Episodes I, II and III and make George Lucas eat every one of them.

In his second term, Trump will make the universe stop expanding. Or maybe Michael Moore, nearly the same thing.

Star Wars lore says there is ALWAYS a Sith Master, and an Apprentice…
Trump used a TV show to try to find an Apprentice…
Coincidence? I think not..

Trump did not even bother to dodge sniper fire in Bosnia.

Trump carries a Galaxy Note 7 in his front pocket

PDT visited the Lincoln Memorial. Abe got up and said “Sir, please, have a seat.”

For every five nuts squirrels find, they have to give Donald Trump one, just because he doesn’t want those furry bastards to get complacent.

Trump wins the Amarillo Big Texan Steak Ranch’s 72 oz Challenge everyday for lunch

Trump bowled a 301 game.

Trump has exactly enough cowbell

PDT plays Wack a Mole with Thor’s hammer.

When Donald Trump was a youngster, he once slapped his b*lls against a credenza in his father’s home and 770 sq. miles of forest were laid to waste in Siberia along the Tunguska River.

Operation Overlord was named after Trump

Trump has a time machine.
How else did he know yesterday about the night before riots that didn’t happen until the night after he made the remark.
He meant to say, “The riots that happen tomorrow night.”

Trump always feels lucky, punk

When the SMOD came to kill the dinosuars, it saw Trump and said “I’ll come back another time if that’s ok with Mr. Trump”

Trump’s rules of engagement: Just win, baby!

There’s a lady who’s sure
all that glitters is gold
and she can’t buy a stairway to heaven
because trump already made a deal for it

The First rule of Trump Club… is he CAN talk about it

Viagra, Cialis, and Trojan have all tried to license the Trump name.

Donald Trump is the sole human being allowed back into Eden, and that’s because he’s management.

Trump gave a little Burmese girl a ruby the size of a tangerine.

That time they waterboarded Trump,
he just couldn’t stop giggling. And his hair was Perfect

It’s rumored that the Secret Service name for Trump is ‘Dreadnaught’.

The Reaper fears Trump.

Georgia Lass, on ‘Dead Like Me’, once tried to reap Trump’s soul, and he wouldn’t let her have it; said ‘too much work to do. I am not leaving until America is Great Again.’

When Trump swims in the Amazon River, the Candiru go find some Piranha to annoy.

When Trumps grandson was born the Mohel said “oy, I am going to need a laser for that one”

Donald Trump is the irresistible force and the immovable object.

Trump is also a rare Dungeons and Dragons character, but you need a 69-sided die to move him.

Donald Trump can make F-35 fly!

Vermintide Moments

December 15, 16

In the vein of Overwatch Moments, Dota 2 Fun Recollections, Civilization 5 Best Stories, Share Your Skyrim Best Moments, Funny, Cool and Other Left 4 Dead 2 Stories, Plants vs Zombies Survival: Endless – Scott’s Setup, The Most Embarassing Ways to Die in Alien Swarm, and Gratuitous Space Battles Quick Tips.


…And a Gutter Runner Pounced Me Out of Nowhere

Playing as Sienna with a Beam Staff, I heard the marching sounds of a Stormvermin Patrok on the other side of the door leading the the open square on The Horn of Magnus. They were far away enough and would be channeled thru the narrow passage, so I decided to light ’em up and let the burn whittle them down while they had to close the gap to us… And a Gutter Runner pounced me out of nowhere that very instant, taking me out of the fight and letting it stab me for ages while my allies were busy.

Another instance on The Horn of Magnus, just coming out onto the rooftops… We heard the HeeYah! sounds and with no place to skirt around them, we prepared for the Stormvermin arrival. I readied my Bardin’s Drakefire Pistols and my ally started the fight… And a Gutter Runner pounced me out of nowhere that very instant, taking me out of the fight and letting it stab me for ages while my allies were busy.


Not-Friends Fire

Knocked down by a Ratling Gunner in Chaff & Wheat, things were made worse by a Stormvermin Patrol beating on my prone form. However the Ratling shots were damaging them more than me due to the angle! At least until my allies killed it before taking on the Stormwemin.

Overwatch Moments

August 9, 16

In the vein of earlier posts Dota 2 Fun Recollections, Civilization 5 Best Stories, Share Your Skyrim Best Moments, Funny, Cool and Other Left 4 Dead 2 Stories, Plants vs Zombies Survival: Endless – Scott’s Setup, The Most Embarassing Ways to Die in Alien Swarm, and Gratuitous Space Battles Quick Tips.

By the way, I finally committed to getting Overwatch (and the new PC setup necessary to run it – heck, even to download it thru which forbids any system with less than 4gb memory from starting the download!) after a massive losing streak in Dota2. Wasting 10-20 minutes due to dumb team in Overwatch > wasting 40-60 minutes in Dota2.


Eastern Wombo Combo

As Mei, I landed a clutch Blizzard which froze 3 enemies… Followed by our D’Va dropping her ult on them for the kills!

When she got the Play of the Game, I mentioned it was possible thanks to me lol.


Nerf This! / Okay!

An enemy D’Va launched her mech right at us in an open street with Self Destruct activated.

Luckily, my Mei Ice Wall was ready to go, and I blocked the full launch and blast!


I Thought I Heard Something

I had just died on Ilios when I heard the cry of an ally falling into the death well.

Little did I know, for the Play of the Game, the enemy Lucio managed to jump out of a highground and rightclick push THREE of my allies into the well!


Lijiang Spammer

On Lijiang Tower one of the King of the Hill capture points is a room partitioned off by pits.

Junkrat (my preferred pick for any occasion) has a blast of a time in this map, camping on a one-way ledge and spamming grenades. When enemies skirmish with my allies and try to move around and dodge, inevitably they stumble into the path or blast radius of my saturation bombing!

More than once I can get killstreaks simply by continually firing at the same spot, over and over. In one game, only one single time a Winston tried to disrupt my cheese – he got Concussive Mined to death for his initiative.


Fool Me Once

In a Competitive Numbani round, as attackers I started spamming long range Junkrat grenades from behind the cover of the bus near the starting point. Suddenly I was killed in an instant by a Tracer, who was revealed in the kill replay to have been hiding up on the ledge to the right of the start door and leapt out to attack when we were busy.

The Competitive match came to Sudden Death, and we were attacking again. Once the start doors opened and we headed out to the capture point, this time I turned back and spammed some grenades up onto that ledge – just in case. Wouldn’t you know it, a short while later Tracer really did come jumping down and died to my Steel Trap + Concussive Mine!


Sorry for the Kill Steal, Zarya

On Hollywood as defending, I was perched on a ledge spamming Junkrat grenades (aaaaaaassss usual) perpendicular to several enemies who were trying to come out of the tunnel, when suddenly they got bunched up by our Zarya’s ultimate.

RIPtire time, I think I got 3 – plus one who died to my grenades just before I let ‘er rip!


He Who Hesitates… Kills

Junkrat defending the second point on Hanamura, the enemy was contesting the capture so I let my Tire rip! Just then, the enemy D’Va activated her ult right on the capture point!

I quickly turned the tire to jam it against the wall and keep it from moving. The D’Va explosion went off, my tire was spared, and I quickly sent it to continue its mission and blew up 2 enemies and D’Va’s freshly resummoned mech!


I’ve Got You In My Sights – No 1 Hero Limit

As Defense on Volskaya Industries, I picked Tobjorn and saw that another player on my team did to. We ended up losing the first capture point, so I started preparing at the final point.

After a bit, I noticed that I was hearing “I’ve got you in my sights” quite a lot. Pressing tab, I was amazed to see SIX enemy Soldier76s and FOUR allied Tobjorns (myself included)!

Soon the capture point was littered with Scrap, which was collected and converted to Armour… Which none of us could use cos we were all armoured up, leaving 10+ pieces just laying around the floor. Sodier76’s “I’ve got you in my sights!” was called out every minute.

We won in the end, but not before some of the enemy finally swapped to other heroes like a Pharah who seemed to be the only attempt at flanking instead of going down the middle to die!

I’ve got you in my sights!


20 Seconds GRAND TOTAL to Win

I joined a Quick match Route 66 as Attacker, and when the deep horn blared, I realized it was 20 seconds left on the clock!!!

So I hobbled toward the payload which was almost to the final point, blowing up an enemy on the way. I grenaded and concussive mined another two as it went into Overtime, and shortly after we won!


Ryujin No Ken Whoopsie There

Defending the last point on Temple of Anubis, the enemy Genji sort-of snuck up on us and RYUJIN NO KEN WO KURAE!!!… And immediately stepped onto my Steel Trap, making him totally useless until we blasted him to death.


What A Difference 1 Second Makes

Watching the Play of the Game…

D’Va activated her Self Destruct in the midst of a bunch of enemies… And then the enemy Mercy activated her own Resurrection, bringing her whole team to life in time to be nuked.

Poor Mercy, just a short delay (if she managed to avoid the mech blast) and SHE would have had Play of the Game.

Another time, our Mercy used Res just after we ran out of overtime and lost the match. Heard her call it out during the game-ending slow mo lol.

Yet another time, during our Genji’s PotG replay, he used Dragonblade and chopped up 3 enemies. The enemy Mercy then used Res, and Genji still in Dragonblade mode proceeded to chop 2 of them down again!


Junkrats Hate Pharahs

Playing a Junkrat and dueling an enemy Pharah almost never works out – especially in the open. Forced to do so once in the clear spaces of the rooftops near the first tunnel on Gibraltar offense, the enemy Pharah finally killed me. Then she lands, walks over the Steep Trap I laid during the chaos, and dies. LoL! I did hope she might land on it, and she unexpectedly did – though not directly onto it from the air.

I did manage to grenade a midair Pharah once though, on Volskaya defense from highground as she was stationary in the air using her ult. Direct hit, pow!

Defending hard so that the attackers couldn’t even get the payload moving at all on Route66, I was just launching my RIPtire when I noticed a rocket land by me. As the Tire rolled up the cliff, I caught a glimpse of Pharah floating behind the vertically-climbing tires… So I reached the top, hopped up and blew it, killing her.

Awhile later, the attackers had pushed the payload to the front of the first building. From the rooftop, I was lobbing bombs and Pharah landed from the sky onto the payload, eating an explosing and dying.

And on Hanamura, our Pharah managed to get a Quintuple kill twice, both times on the second point – once on attack when our Zarya dropped a Graviton Surge and I contributed some bombs, then once on defense. Which would get PotG??? …Turns out neither, our attack on the first point where Mercy Res’ed and my newly alive into RIPtire killed one enemy thru their Lucio’s ult got the replay. Doh!


The Only Time Jank Ever Changed

On Volskaya defense, somehow we let the attackers capture both points with 4 minutes to spare! When it was our turn to attack, we did manage to even the score- but with just 1 minute left. It was a disaster, the match a gone case.

Continuation round, as usual I went with Junkrat. An ally told me “Jank please healer” and with nothing to lose, I picked Zenyatta – whom I basically never play.

We rushed the points, and somehow I managed to survive by keeping allies between myself and the enemy, just shooting blindly from behind their vision blocking bodies and pressing Shift or E whenever the prompt popped up.

We took both points in the time limit, and when we switched to defense I went back to my usual Junk bomb spam while allies camped the choke. The enemy couldn’t even get more than 1 guy at a time to the capture point for the whole 4 minutes.

Comeback is real!

…And that is how I used my one free change of Blizzard Name to rename myself JankPlsChnge as seen below:



And I didn’t change, and we won.


…Except that one time that ironically led to the name.


Never Bring a Gun to a Tire Fight

Having solo sparred with McCree a few times, on Dorado offense after another skirmish I followed but then lost him in the corridors. So I let it be and headed to the main fight with a ready ult, dropping my usual 2 trap combo on the floor.

Going on around a corner and seeing some action in the main square, I Q’ed… Just as I saw the Enemy Trapped notification. Unable to trigger my Concussion while in RIPTire mode, I made the decision to wheel it back around and down the corridor I had just left… Where McCree was still stuck. BOOM! Worth it lol!


Heads Up… Heads Gone!

Doing my usual Jank spam-the-capture-point on Ilios Ruins, which was going decently. However all my allies quit the point, as the enemy started capturing it at blazing speed!

So I made the call to hop down from my camping spot in the room next to the narrow bridge, but just a moment to slow to prevent the point being lost to the enemy.

Not to worry, because as I suddenly appeared and tossed a Concussion Mine at the bunched up enemy and blew it up midair above their heads, I got an unexpected THREE kills plus the enemy Junk’s Steel Trap!

It wasn’t over yet, as I had to spar with the Zarya who wasn’t in the blast radius or else hadn’t been killed. Jumping like a mad monkey shooting at her feet, a stray bomb hit another survivor and got the fourth kill!

Needless to say I already guessed I’d get play of the game, and sure enough.


Regarding Symmetra’s Dual Select Ultimates:




Way back in 26 Oct 2016.


Better Than a Banana Peel

Enemy Winston had been a nuisance on Lijiang Tower – Market’s capture point, constantly jumping on us with his zap or knocking us about (and me off the edge) with his ultimate, while his allies were usually much faster to dispatch. But we still had the advantage and held the point most of the round.

Finally with 99% captured, the enemy tried one last ditch attempt to take the point over. Winston was the last to come in, activating his Rage… And stepping right on my Steel Trap in the middle of the room. Our Pharah reacted with a standing Rocket Barrage right at him for several seconds for the kill and the win!

Relevant comic by Nerf Now!:



Steel Trap Killsteals

Camping as usual on King’s Row with Junkrat, suddenly an enemy Reaper flew past me and slammed into the wall in front due to my allied Reinhardt’s Charge… And passed over my Steel Trap which triggered and killed Reaper before the wall slam damage did. Made me laugh.

Another time on Dorado, we defended the payload, stalling the movement so it only got as far as the first building around the corner after a long time. Jumping (for some extra throw distance) and dropping a steel trap blindly over the edge, it landed on the payload edges. A similarly tossed concussion was detonated and flung a Genji (I think) directly into the trap, no time to even fly above the payload (maybe protected by a Zarya shield which is why he didn’t instantly die). Then a Doomfist made it up to the roof where I was, so I tossed an emergency concussion and detonated it to fly away – dropping a steel trap as I flew backwards. As I came down, I saw Doomfist charging his rocket punch and aim at me – and hit the steel trap, dying! Finally, down on the ground from the above skirmish, I walked to the payload still near the same corner, lobbed some grenades, got my ult charged and let my RIPtire go – just in time to see four enemies running to the right, not looking at my direction. Triple kill and overtime flowed to zero, I won the match with that kill!

On Dorado defense, I dropped a Steel Trap on top of the payload’s flatbed area (somehow this manages to catch people quite often), and later the enemy Reinhardt who was skirmishing around it ‘stepped’ onto it and died. Might have something to do with the road incline causing the flatbed to clip into the ground somewhat, making the Trap about ground level momentarily. We won that map, and the next game for me was Volskaya Industries on offense. One of my teammates said he was so triggered by me last game, I asked who he was – it was the enemy Reinhardt! He continued that he kept trying to kill me. Well in that Dorado map, his Rein was often the only one pushing and doing much while the rest of his team were in shambles.


Nett Gain: -70 Coins

So I decided to pay 75 credits to unlock Junkrat’s “Merry Christmas!” voice line before the Winter season ended. And then the very next Loot crate I opened had that very voice line, giving me a paltry refund of 5 credits -_-


First Person Puncher

A Genji snuck thru a side route and confronted my Tobjorn. At low HP, he stood in place and did his deflection hoping I’d shoot and kill myself. I walked up to him and punched him dead in one hit lol.

On Gibraltar Attack, I was prowling the catwalks just after the first point when enemy Pharah channeled her ultimate. Her head was just at my height, so I punched her dead out of her ult!

And again as Tob, enemy Reinhardt put up his shield. So I punched him through it, twice, to kill him.


Ult Kills Ult

Stiking from the little room in Nepal Sanctum, my Junkrat activated RIPTire… And it died moments later. I thought it had simply been blasted down as soon as it exited the door, but then I died and saw the killcam replay – enemy Tracer had put her Pulse Bomb on my Tire accidentally, and the tiny explosion radius only killed it! She had to shoot me manually as I scooted around after the Tire expired.


Main Junkrat

Playing Junkrat on Competitive as usual, we barely survived a Kings Row defence… Not a good show by me, but our Lucio saved us all with his ult when enemy Zarya and Hanzo combined theirs on the payload we were blocking.

The next round, one of my team noticed that I ‘main junkrat’ with only 4 hours only playing competitive, which his buddies found amusing too.

Attacking all the way to metres before the final point, I hid in the corner of the room and bounced bombs out to the payload. Everyone else who came along with me died.

The enemy Reaper noticed me and came for me, but got exploded. I then ulted, with the Tire killing both the enemy Rein and Road, then I got on the payload and moments later, pushed it the last step to victory alone.


Lucio Botches the Landing

Enemy Reaper had shadow stepped up onto the roof outside the Volskaya Industries starting spawn, which I noticed as Junkrat on offense. I died shortly after, so when I respawned I Concussioned up there and knocked him off with grenades.

My ultimate charged, I sent my RIP-Tire up the wall and thru the small hole to the right of the choke point. Coming down, it saw the enemy scattering backwards – Zarya spotted the tire as she backpedaled round the corner of the hut by the control point with the healthpack inside.

So I climbed the wall instead, going onto the roof before jumping the Tire down – and there was Lucio, “Break it DOWN!!!” in mid-air, sound-thingy raised to slam down on the ground and give everyone shields – and my Tire exploded right before it happened. Triple Kill, and we easily took the point after that.

But yes, as Lucio, I got killed a few times while trying to ult.

PATCH NOTES: Reduced Lucio’s airtime when using his ultimate, YOU WISH!!!


Portal to Heck

Shortly after respawning on Lijiang Tower – Garden and heading back out, I heard Symmetra’s line for “Teleporter online.” So I turned back to use it… And died immediately as the enemy Pharah was channeling her ult directly at the teleporter. Mercy who also used the teleport at around the same time splattered and the porter exploded too.


Jank Wastes Your Ults

Defense on Eichenwald, I went up the stairs and set up my usual trap+concuss to watch my back while I dropped bombs from that unexpected angle. The bombchucking must have been triggering enough to enemy Reinhardt that he walked up behind me, stepping in my trap. I spun round to see him, my bombs hitting his shield as I backed off – and he used HAMMER DOWN as I dropped off the stairs, unscathed.

Later Defense on Temple of Anubis, I was defending the second point from an invasion and did my usual chuck a concuss and trigger it to get some instant AoE. Coincidentally, enemy Reaper activated his Death Blossom and killed one me – before flying up into the air like a helicopter, hitting no one else lol!


Quintuple Kill Junk

As Junk, my team on attack Route 66 fought chaotic skirmishes all the way to the last point. Revving up my RIPtire and sneaking it round the back flank, the enemy Mercy used Res. Almost immediately after, I rammed the Tire into a pillar and exploded it blind. Surprisingly, I got my first quintuple kill! Thanks Mercy.

As Junk defending on Temple of Anubis, I concussed myself up to the high ledge overlooking the first capture point. From there I did my usual choke-spam (normally I do it from ground level). The enemy responded by taking the left route and contesting my allies who were on the lower ledge. As they focused on our Orisa and her barrier, with our Mercy hiding around the corner and healing Orisa, I just spammed bombs at them which – along with a Concussion – got a Quadruple and finished off a fifth (credit going to Orisa+Mercy).

Later when they made it to the first point, I just turned and continued to shoot bombs down. I didn’t even have to strafe or dodge, I had 99% no attention turned my way the whole match!

And when we switch sides, on attack when I managed to get to the highground thru the stairways, again I had unchallenged spamtime. Unbelieveable actually.


Nemesis (Dum da da daah!)

As Lucio on the moon, I was strafing and managed to keep alive for a long time on attack… Until Doomfist 1 shotted me (technically, 1 shot and 1 slam into a wall).

And this repeated twice!

The same match, on attack after almost the whole time on Lucio, I switched to Junk just as we won. So I said if I use Junk we win. Later I started defend as Junk, then switched to Lucio. After we successfully defended the first point, I said that I told them if I don’t use Junk we win. Someone noted that I was funny lol.


Straight Down the Middle

Playing Year of the Dog capture the flag on Ayutthaya.

Using Rein, after some trading of fire down the middle path, I looped around the side stairs and found that the enemy flag was guarded by Tob alone with his turret.

Shield up to block the turret fire from a long distance, I lined up a Flame Strike and Charge… Hitting both the turret and Tob who was behind it ready to repair, my Flame + Charge blew up the turret and I pinned Tob to a wall, squishing him.

That left me unmolested to walk to the flag and carry it all the way to our capture point!

In the same match, again I found myself in the same faceoff against Tob… And basically did the same thing again! This time my team had already stolen the flag, so I had nothing to do but stand around while they deposited the flag and it respawned. I only managed to grab it and walk a bit of a way before getting ganked.


Fly Me to the Earth

First time on Blizzard World, enemy D’va decided to use the usual launch+ult tactic… But sending the mech along the floor, it got caught in my Trap and exploded harmlessly in a doorway lol!

Another game, assaulting the last capture point on Hanamura, I charged as Rein just as enemy D’va ulted! I crashed into the mech and pinned it to the wall, immediately backing off with shield up. The angle meant that my whole team survived the blast as I blocked it.

Art Student Owl Memes

April 29, 16

My pick of the endless ones from

Until I got exhausted reading the still-endless-left list.

Note: I am not, nor was I ever, and artist or art student. But this sounds like what it would be like to be one, and from my recollection of what art-inclined housemates were like.


And 300+ follow below the break. Stil not as many as the 900+ I picked out from the College Liberal Meme!


Dota2 Webcomics

December 13, 13

My pick from Imgur.

Even more at this 400+ image set.

See also related: Dota 2 Fun Recollections.


College Liberal Meme – Fave Picks Pt 4

November 23, 13

Due the large number, the images are split between 4 posts.

#001 – #250 and the intro are here.

#251 – #500 are here.

#501 – #750 are here.

#751 – #900+ are below.


College Liberal Meme – Fave Picks Pt 3

November 23, 13

Due the large number, the images are split between 4 posts.

#001 – #250 and the intro are here.

#251 – #500 are here.

#501 – #750 are below.

#751 – #900+ are here.


College Liberal Meme – Fave Picks Pt 2

November 23, 13

Due the large number, the images are split between 4 posts.

#001 – #250 and the intro are here.

#251 – #500 are below.

#501 – #750 are here.

#751 – #900+ are here.


College Liberal Meme – Fave Picks

November 23, 13

Via Know Your Meme, Quickmeme and Meme Generator.

See also collected other memes:
Super Strict Success Asian Mom and Dad Meme Lols
RPG Motivational Posters
Demotivators – Depressing Anti-Motivational Posters

Or heck, just straight to My Obsessive-Compulsive List of My Obsessive-Compulsive Lists.

Due the large number, the images are split between 4 posts.

#001 – #250 are below.

#251 – #500 are here.

#501 – #750 are here.

#751 – #900+ are here.

Be warned, 200+ images below the break! (All are jpg expect the 2nd and 4th ones.)

See also collected other memes: Super Strict Success Asian Mom and Dad Meme Lols


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